I’m a doggist. Are you?

Well well well, did I just hear a human willing to barter his own life for that of a dog’s? That’s rich, coming from the only animal with the cognitive powers supreme to any other creature on the planet, the luxury of having services at your disposal when you want and how you want. For those who haven’t gotten the point quite yet, let me just put it out there for you, A DOG’S LIFE IS AS HARD AS YOURS. PROBABLY HARDER BUT NOT ANY LESS TEDIOUS THAN A HUMAN’S. 
It isn’t easy being a dog. No one wants to be on the dumb end of a conversation. We humans have words to relay our thoughts. Dogs don’t. You could be trying to discipline your dog and did you ever stop to think that maybe he’s trying hard to understand you? Maybe he WANTS to be liked by you but can hardly tell the difference between the plethora of words you utter to him on a daily basis! Cognition and the gift of speech are man’s greatest assets. 

Can you imagine a world without them? I certainly can’t. I need to talk to people, I need to read, I need to understand, because when I did fathom nature, I learnt how to make fire, I learnt how to protect myself from predators and natural calamities. As a dog, you’re more or less a four legged helpless animal who can only hope and pray that he has a strong shelter to survive the floods or whatever other unfortunate event you can think of. 

As a dog, he won’t know which plants to eat, he’s just a man’s best friend, he might just be trusting his master blindly while he feeds him poison each day, a poison that resembles a meal other dogs could only dream of. 

Now for the lighter stuff, a dog has to search the entire neighbourhood for a private place to pee because this earth is infiltrated with perverts who like staring unabashedly, these perverts otherwise called “humans”. Do you know the feeling of roaming around with an irritating collar around your neck your entire life? Well that’s just for the domestic ones. The strays have to battle the adversities of weather and competition for food when only a bare minimum may be available. Emphasis on the “may be”.

Also, can you imagine having your body temperature soaring and not being able to sweat ? It gets worse for the furry ones. 

And what is with some of the dogs having their tails cut ? Would you want your amazing long, silky, shiny, flowy hair to be snipped off and never allowed to grow because it’s a liability to your balance ? 

Also, can you imagine the frustration you’ll feel when you bark for food but the owner mistakes it for lack of attention and makes you play fetch instead, in turn lowering your energy levels further?

Can you imagine? Can you?

I could go on like this. I could state a million reasons as to why a dog’s life is no better. 

I see how they talk about feminists on tv all the time. Well you know what ? We humans don’t need support, we’ve been given enough already, we just need to get our shit together and make it work. It’s like a thousand piece puzzle. Your pieces are given, all you have to do is piece them together and viola ! There you have it, a literal civilisation true to its name. As for me, I don’t believe in feminism or any other -ism I can think of. All I know is, I’m a single doggist against the army of feminists. 

So, take your time, make a decision, tell me who’s joining my party because, honestly, doggists are way cooler than feminists. 

#narcissista 

P.s. Doggist isn’t a word. Yet. 

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